Category: Editorials

Psst…Clone Wars Adventures Is For Kids…


So much for this being photoshopped...

Star Wars: Clone Wars Adventures launched ten days ago to moderate fanfare from the media (IE: Me), a factor that can mostly be attributed to the idea that the game is for kids. This isn’t to say that Clone Wars Adventures is a low quality game, simply that many kids are likely to just jump right into the game, rather than research it beforehand. Any research being done will most probably be by the parents, and as a direct result many of the articles are directed towards that group.

Now, I do the occasional review of Nintendo DS and Wii games over at Giantbomb.com, but I can honestly say I have never played Imagine: Party Time Babyz nor do I have any inclination towards the title. I’m sure by my standards it is a sloppily put together low budget shovelware title that copies every other mini-game framework on the market and sticks it on the shelf for fifty bucks, knowing that little girls will see the photographs of babies on the front and beg and scream at their mothers to buy it, but to each his own. What you also don’t see me doing is buying the game and reviewing it, from the perspective of a twenty-one year old with a mustache, and talking about how easy it is. I have the reasoning ability to know that Party Babyz is not directed towards my age group. Luckily, however, Party Babyz costs money, meaning no one except the target demographic is going to buy it, making such badly aimed reviews nonexistent.

So it baffles me when I read a news article on Star Wars: Clone Wars Adventures hitting one million registered users just a week after launch, and the threads are populated with claims that the figure must be a lie, that nine hundred thousand of them must have quit, that it is essentially a lobby with mini-games, Free Realms is much better, etc.

News flash to Sony Trolls: Clone Wars Adventures is a lobby-centered mini-game-based social activity center for children. It incorporates a wide variety of fairly short mini-games with a difficulty setting that ranges from extremely easy to quite difficult, even for many adults, and foregos grinding mobs for grinding mini-games. CWA is also not Free Realms, it has been designed with a 100% different outlook in mind, as a lobby based game, where Free Realms is closer to your more traditional open world approach.

Granted, most of this frothing rage is coming from your usual Sony trolls of whom, if Sony had made the aforementioned Party Babyz, would buy the game for full price and then complain about how Sony screwed up once again. One million users may mean absolutely nothing in terms of activity, but a lot of the feedback towards this news isn’t directed at the one million figure, but rather your usual nerd rage coming from a group of people who still haven’t grown up from the Star Wars Galaxies Combat Upgrade, or who still hold ire towards Sony for Vanguard’s botched launch.

More on Clone Wars Adventures as it appears.

Nothing Says Loving Like A Non-Functioning Patcher


Excuse me, I'd like to sell this patcher. It's, uh, rare.

Under normal circumstances, I could chalk this up to Final Fantasy XIV having just launched yesterday (for the head start) but at some point I would be injecting rationale and patience into an area of the system where people have historically rejected both. If you haven’t participated in Square Enix’s foray into the newest generation of Massively Multiplayer titles, Final Fantasy XIV has among the least user friendly patch downloading tools on the market. In open beta, I was assured by several vehement defenders that my infinity-estimated waiting time for this nine gigabyte patch would be fixed by the time the game launched. Granted, I was also called a “trolling d-bag” for my discontent that a fifteen megabyte patch should have a six hour waiting time, so take with it what you will.

Those of you who, like myself, managed to get into the open beta likely accomplished this task by using the Megaupload links on FFXIVcore, or managed to find the patches using someone else’s torrent system. As a number of people pointed out on unofficial forums (as the open beta testers weren’t allowed into the Square Enix forums), nothing kills interest in a game like being forced to jump through hoops just to install the damned thing.

Of course, this isn’t me just pulling “the general consensus” out of my rear end and presenting it as the majority opinion. A couple years ago, when NCsoft was putting forth plans to move Dungeon Runners to a web-client system, they noted that around one third of their users never even got past downloading the game. Of course people who plucked down fifty bucks on a game are going to try a lot harder to get in, but consider early discontent as a playing factor when Square Enix’s post 1-month figures come back.

Remember, a guy who says “I hated the game, there’s lag/performance issues” convinces few, as lag is subjective and based on time, location, and the person’s computer/internet. On the other hand, a person who says “I can’t really give an opinion, I never got the game working,” stands to convince many more not to go through the hassle of even giving the game a chance. Opinions on a game vary from person to person, but barriers of entry are universal.

So is Final Fantasy XIV doomed to head down the All Points Bulletin route and crash by this December? Not a snowball’s chance in hell. Owing to the Square Enix community, there are more than enough people willing to embrace the patcher, with its faults, and deal with it to cover those who will quit after the first month’s free time. If anything, one might consider the patcher a test of patience. If you’re patient enough to get download and move all the patches, then some of the facets of the game itself will be a breeze (not getting into that here, however). Of course, there is still plenty of time for Square to streamline the patcher once the population has gone down to its core populace.

More on Final Fantasy XIV as it appears.

MMO Boards (Re)Open For Business


I stand to make none.

The MMO Fallout forums are open for business! This time we’re sharing space with a fake venture between myself and a former classmate.

The forums can be found at www.stillwater17.com. Check it out.

Check Out The New Sales Page!


Save you some of this.

I’ve been getting some feedback over MMO Fallout’s sales articles, namely they are cumbersome and take up far too much space on the main page, and secondly that they can be confusing if they aren’t updated in a while. So, in response, I’m launching the MMO Fallout Sales Directory. Located at https://mmofallout.com/sales, you’ll be able to find a consolidated list of the current Steam, Direct2Drive, and Impulsedriven sales.

Large sales will still be posted here on the main page (Steam/D2D’s giant Christmas sales for starters) while the rest will be updated on the Sales page, and through Twitter. So keep watching the Twitter feed on the side of the page for items like:

More sales to come. You can follow sales easier by following MMO Fallout on Twitter at @mmofallout

Star Trek Online: Ten Dollhairs On Amazon


Away team of the USS R'lyeh

Captains log, stardate 2365 rounded off to the nearest decimal point. While on a trade mission to the Steam quadrant, our ship received a hail from the jungle planet of Amazon Rigel IV in an attempt to offload ancient relics at a reasonable price. The items themselves are data disks dating back to the early twenty first century, containing on them a “video game,” based on long forgotten dreams of space exploration. Our ship was not equipped with the necessary equipment to make use of these disks, but we agreed to forward the message to anyone who could make use of such primitive technology.

Those looking to buy should be informed that the low prices are supplemented by delivery costs and time, making a more timely and, arguably cheaper, alternative in other sources of purchase, particularly the D2D and Steam quadrants, both of which offer this product in transmission form.

Europeans Are Playing LOTRO Free


European.

I’m starting to think Europeans got the better deal with this delay. Assuming you’ve been following LOTRO’s transition to free to play cash shop, you are well aware that Codemasters has delayed the transition since Turbine moved the North American servers over ten days ago (the 10th). What you may not be aware of is that Codemasters has set up a free play period for the duration of this transition, opening up old accounts and inviting new players to this period with the “trial” account system.

To be quite frank, this sounds like a better deal than the American players are getting on the US server. Sure, the cash shop might be down, but doesn’t this mean that players (for the moment) have access to the whole game for free? Obviously not the expansions they don’t own, but the other restrictions that free accounts under the new system have. If anything, being a European player of LOTRO makes now the best time to get into the game, and experience as much of the whole initial game for free before your account turns into a basic, and you’ll know which features are worth paying for when the full free to play experience rolls out.

I might be missing something, but to me it sounds like “Sorry the official cake, which you’ll have to pay for the icing and more than once slice, has been delayed. Have this unofficial cake while you wait, we couldn’t make it official because the period at the end of the lettering is actually a comma, but otherwise it’s the same cake. You can eat the whole thing while you wait.”

Is it too late for Turbine to delay the free to play?

Quote of the Week #2: Explaining LOTRO F2P To Non-Payers


Cheapskates will not enjoy F2P hybrid games. The point is not to make a quality product that costs millions to make and then allow everyone to run through it for free like charity. It is designed to make money.

You can either sub and avoid all the hassles. Or you can pay here and there to get past certain hassles. Or you can grind points in game to not pay a cent and get past hassles. The choice is up to you. But people expecting to have a game that they could just run around in and level all the way up etc. without having to either pay or grind are insane.

From the MMORPG.com forums, this one has been passing around for a couple weeks now, but I’m going to attribute it to user Snarlingwolf. Why? Just because.

Crimecraft Trailer…Mmm, Chunky.


I’m getting in the habit of posting more trailers here on MMO Fallout, so here’s the latest from Crimecraft, showcasing the game’s dismemberment system.

[insert ESRB warning about blood and gore]

Mortal Online Shows Off Old Models.


This video surfaced on Mortal Online’s Youtube page a couple days ago, showing some of the original models.

Jagex Goes Old School With Undercroft


Mmm so two dimensional

Undercroft is not a new game, by any means. In fact, it was developed and sold through the Apple store for Ipod/Iphone/Ipad up until last month, for a few bucks. Rake In Grass, the developer, sold the game and IP to another game studio, and I’ll give you one guess as to which studio bought it up (psst. Look at the title.) The app was pulled from the app store and re-released yesterday (the 16th) under Jagex’s branding, completely for free. Considering Undercroft weighs in at 18mb, the game is touted as holding over 20 hours of gameplay, 60 enemies, and over 750 items.

The game plays out like the old faux-3D games many of us used to play before you kids and your true-3D experiences. Players create a party of four adventurers who wake up in a jail only to find that they got drunk the previous night and chased a local peasant woman’s chickens all over town, and you will not be allowed to leave town until you find all of them. Everything is done from first person, and the game plays pretty differently depending on which abilities you choose.

For example, one of my party members is an old woman, who happens to be a priest. I gave her the spells heal and indulgence, the latter of which is an interesting spell because it persuades NPCs that they are sinners, and must pay as a penance. So I approached the woman whose chickens I had potentially killed in a drunken stupor, and made her pay me for her sins. Then I found all the chickens, obtained the reward, and made her pay me again. Afterward, I forced the guard who wouldn’t let me leave town to pay me for his sins.

Hopefully Jagex is working on a sequel/expansion, but until then Undercroft is available 100% free, no charges at all (except the cost of an iPod/iPad).

This game is literally foaming over with nostalgia. If you have an iTouch/ipod/iPad, you should check out this app. But don’t take my word for it, check out the trolls on the iTunes reviews!

My money is on pre-teens who have never played any old school RPG titles.